Chef Mel

I am so grateful at this moment to be here in Arlington. I really am going to miss all my friends and support network. But one of the fun things about moving, and also just summer, is the gatherings. Birthday/going parties, potlucks, random BBQs, needing to clean out the freezer, etc., have given me ample opportunities to stretch my chef legs and make different culinary delights. Examples include: red/white/blue cupcakes, my first angel food cake (which turned out terrific), a crockpot roasted chicken (slow cooked so the meat literally fell off the bones) in an apple wine sauce, bite-sized quiches, vegetable-au-gratin (which sounds gross but is possibly the most delicious thing I’ve ever made) and my standard 5-minute strawberry shortcake. I really love to cook/bake. I’m told the food’s good too, and I know I certainly enjoy it. There are never any leftovers, so it must be true! I’m glad I can cook for my friends while I’m still here and hopeful that I will find wonderful friends up there to cook for as well.

Raspberry angel food cake with raspberry preserve topping. Lo-cal and low fat too!

The moving plans are slowly beginning to finalize. Road trip is in progress (keep those ideas coming!) and so are the pre-move wedding details. (Just to clarify, I am NOT getting married. At least not yet. My friend is the weekend before I move.) I also received my consultant contract and it’s a lot more than I was expecting. I’ve started the selling process of furniture I’m not taking with me and I have a small city of boxes in my dining room area. As the details become more finalized, the move becomes more real and I am finally starting to get excited. I can tell because when someone asked me about it today, I didn’t panic as a reaction and start thinking about everything I still have left to do. Instead I gave her a big toothy smile and said, “I can’t wait to go!”

I'm going on a road trip and I'm bringing...

A car full of stuff! After a successful convention in Orlando, I am finally on the home stretch to my move! I have secured transportation for most of my stuff, mapped out a loose plan for actually getting it from DC to Edmonton, and started working out the great summer road trip to Canada.

So far, D and I will be traveling to Alberta via North Carolina, Tennessee, Missouri, Iowa, Minnesota, South Dakota and Montana. So my question to you out in the blog-o-sphere is, where should we stop? We’ve considered a few places (Memphis, St. Louis, Minneapolis, Black Hills, etc.) but would love to hear about where you’ve been, where to sleep, where to eat, what to see, etc. Please send me your best bets and ideas!

The whole experience has been overwhelming. Not just the logistics of moving, but the mental implications of the move as well. It’s not easy to just pack up and go, leaving behind wonderful friends and fond memories. And for people who have never gone through a large move like this, I gotta tell you: No matter how in control you feel, you’re not. My sister just recently moved to Norfolk and she’s been my litmus test…Results indicate that this is not going to be easy. I think the experience of having done this twice now is haunting me, making me feel worried and apprehensive about it all. But I still know I’m doing the right thing. I know it because I love D. I know it because I think I’m just ready to move on and begin a new chapter.

If nothing else, this will be a grand adventure! No work, no responsibility, just a few weeks months of rest and relaxation. I think I will like being a lady of leisure, at least for a little while.

Melancholia!!!

So, I was ready to write a blog about how crazy I feel, how I'm freaking out about moving because I haven't actually done anything yet and how I'm worried about jobs because I have zero leads and the consulting work with my current company seems to be falling through. Then I thought about the word "melancholia" and this is how Webster's dictionary defines it:

A mental condition and especially a manic-depressive condition characterized by extreme depression, bodily complaints and often hallucinations and delusions.

Huh. That's not how I feel AT ALL or what I thought the word "melancholy" meant. So I looked that up. Again, Websters:

A depressions of spirits; a pensive mood.

Ok, so how can pretty much the same word be defined so differently? It made me laugh and definitely lifted my spirits. Only I would be lifted by the intricacies of the English language. Nerd.

My Favorite Time of Day

Everyone has a favorite time of day…A small piece of their day that is peaceful and calm, regenerating your spirit for whatever comes next. For me, this moment happens in the morning when I drink my first cup of coffee. I am one of the few people I know who actually likes the taste of coffee. Day, afternoon or night, I enjoy the flavor of the beans. I don’t particularly need the caffeine; it’s just my drink of choice.

But I look forward to that first cup in the morning. I make my way to work, fighting the DC-metro traffic, and trudge up the four flights of stairs to my office. I sit down, let my computer start up and take that first sip. Immediately everything I’ve been worrying about or dreading at work is gone. My body relaxes and my mind is calm as I savor that first sip. And as the email floods in and the files load, I continue to sip my coffee barely noticing anything around me. I feel serene and at ease with the workload or problems facing my day. During the weekend this is even better because I don’t have to shift gears right away. I can enjoy my first cup and stare off into space as the caffeine slowly coaxes my body awake. For me, this is better than a massage because I feel very relaxed after that first cup and ready to conquer the day.

Frustrations

This week, I am extremely frustrated with life. I am struggling to understand myself and what I want versus what the world around me is trying to convince me I want. Long story short, I was at the beach this weekend with some very good friends I've known a very long time. We've gone through a lot together and I was looking forward to it. By the end of the weekend, I was in tears and angry about some of my own actions and some of theirs. It seems that they don't think I really want to move to Canada. Which got me wondering, do other people think that? What am I saying to others to make them think that? And are they right? I have never been so doubtful about a decision before as I am right now. True, big decisions are, well, BIG. But at this point I've already "quit" my job and started cleaning out my apartment. Everyone knows I'm planning to leave, so why tell me you don’t think I want to go?

It hurts that I feel so little support for this decision. I am flattered that people don’t want me to leave, but come on. Shouldn’t my friends be somewhat supportive? I am still going to be friends with them. I am moving to be with a guy that makes me very happy. I mean, ridiculously happy. I was telling another friend about this and asked her the same question, “What do you hear when I talk about D and Canada?” Her answer surprised me. She said that in all the years I’ve known her, she’s never seen me so happy. So how can others doubt my intentions if I am “so happy”? I just wish I felt more support from the people around me. This is going to sound harsh but the whole thing makes me think that maybe certain friends aren’t really the good friends I thought they were and that makes it easier to leave them behind.

Adventures in Baking

I have never been much of a baker. I enjoy baked goods, but prefer the feel if a knife and sizzle of the skillet while cooking. Standing in a hot kitchen, watching something rise in the oven is not always fun to me. But every now and then I have an occasion to bake and yesterday was a great excuse.

My friend S and I were born 10 days apart. For the last 6 years we’ve taken turns baking each other a birthday cake. It started with a cheesecake, and every year one of us makes a cheesecake. This year was my turn and now that I’m not eating sweets, I searched for a recipe that involved cream cheese but would be small or easily frozen. And, thanks to the awesome cupcake recipe deck I got one year, I found a cheesecake cupcake recipe. Huzzah! It turned out really well. These are dense, but could be either a dessert or breakfast, depending on your mood. The recipe calls for an extra large cupcake pan, but I made them in a standard, cutting the batter measurements in half. In retrospect, I think the extra large allows more room for the cream cheese filling, but they still turned out well. I also used low fat cream cheese and sour cream. I don’t think it took away any flavor. Next time I think I’ll throw in some coconut for variety.

Vanilla Cheesecake Crunch-Top Cupcakes

Cream Cheese Filling

1 8-oz package cream cheese, room temperature
¼ cup sugar
1 large egg, room temperature
1 tsp finely grated lemon zest
1 tbsp fresh lemon juice
½ tsp vanilla extract

Crumble Topping

½ cup unbleached all-purpose flour
1/3 cup packed light brown sugar
1/8 tsp salt
2 tbsp unsalted butter, melted

Cake Batter

1 ¼ cups unbleached all-purpose flour
½ tsp baking powder
¼ tsp baking soda
¼ tsp salt
1 large egg
1 large egg yolk
1 cup sugar
½ cup canola or corn oil
1 tsp vanilla extract
½ cup sour cream

Powdered sugar for dusting

Position a rack in the middle of the oven. Preheat the oven to 325F. Line 12 extra-large muffin tin cups with large paper cupcake liners. Spray the inside of each liner with nonstick cooking spray.

Make the Filling

In a large bowl, using an electric mixer on low speed, beat the cream cheese and sugar until smoothly blended. Beat in the egg. Mix in the lemon zest, lemon juice, and vanilla. Set aside.

Make the Topping

In a medium bowl, using a large spoon, stir the flour, brown sugar, and salt together. Add the melted butter and continue stirring until the crumbs form. Set aside.

Make the Cake Batter

Sift the flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt into a medium bowl and set aside.

In a large bowl, using an electric mixer on medium speed, beat the egg, egg yolk, and sugar until thickened and lightened, about 2 minutes. Stop the mixer and scrape the sides of the bowl as needed during mixing. On low speed, mix in the oil and vanilla. Mix in the sour cream until no white streaks remain. Mix in the flour mixture until the batter is smooth.

Spoon three generous tbsp of the batter into each cupcake liner. Spoon 1 ½ tbsp of cream cheese filling into the center of each; the soft filling will spread slightly over the batter. Sprinkle a generous tbsp of crumb topping over each. The paper liners will be filled to about ½ inch from the top. Bake just until the top feels firm and a toothpick inserted in the center comes out clean, about 25 minutes [mine took a couple minutes longer]. The cupcakes will rise to the top of the paper liners. Cool the cupcakes for 20 minutes in the pan on a wire rack. Remove the cupcakes from the pan into a wire rack and let cool completely. If any crumbs fall off, replace them.

Dust the cooled cupcakes lightly with powdered sugar before serving. [I added fresh raspberries instead of the powdered sugar, but whatever suits your taste. These are very sweet without the extra sugar.]

 
Diet Update

I am currently down 25 pounds! Surely but slowly getting there. My summer clothes don’t fit, so I may have to indulge in some transition items just so I have something to wear!

Just Slammed

I haven’t had time to write lately because I have been just slammed at work with projects and deadlines. There really is too much to do these days, and the weeks and months ahead appear to be worse. BUT the diet and weight loss continue to go well in spite of this increase in stress. My go-to stress reliever has always been food. And while I can feel the chocolate cravings more intensely these days, they are easier to ward off because it’s a psychological thing, not a body addiction thing.

So, I still feel great. To date, I have lost 13 pounds! And I guess it’s starting to show because every day, someone stops me and tells me how skinny I look. I can’t say I hate it. It feels really good to hear and motivates me to keep going! So far, none of my work clothes fit and the bridesmaid dress I have to wear in three weeks went from being too small to too big, so big I WILL have to get it altered this weekend. Dangit. I did not want to spend the money!

The only thing I wish I had was time to continue trying new recipes and low-glycemic meals. For now, I’m running on soups and salads, and my shirataki noodles are sitting in my fridge untouched. I’m hoping that after the wedding, my weekends will be mine to enjoy and I can start trying these recipes. Until then I’ll just keep my belt tight and hope my pants don’t fall off as I walk up the stairs to my office.